Takeaway
Choosing a mentor is one of the most important decisions you can make.
Estimated Reading Time is 3 Minutes
What is a Mentor and What is Mentorship?
Dictionary.com defines a mentor as a wise and trusted counselor or teacher. Wikipedia has the definition of Mentorship as a relationship in which a more experienced or more knowledgeable person helps to guide a less experienced or knowledgeable person. There are a number of concepts in those two definitions that are important to understand and think about as you consider choosing a mentor and entering a time of mentorship. Among them are the ideas of trust, finding someone who is skilled at teaching, and someone who has the willingness to help guide you.
Trust
What is the basis of trusting another person? For one, knowing this person has our best interest as their primary goal. Notice I said primary because I want to assure you that someone who stands to benefit themselves if you are successful, shouldn’t be disqualified from the list of trusted people. In fact, if you can find someone who you feel has your best interests at heart, and they will benefit if you are successful, I think all the more reason to consider that person as a mentor. Most of my managerial mentors were either my bosses or even someone my boss reported to.
The idea of trust implies consistency and truth. If someone is consistent in their approach, response, and opinions, and over time they turn out to be right, we typically develop a trust in this person.
Teacher
I learned early on that not everyone I looked up to and admired was necessarily a good choice to be my mentor. Finding a mentor who has both the skills and the gifts of teaching is critical. Some of the highest performers are so good at what they do that often we use words like “gifted” or “natural” to describe how effortlessly they make it seem. Are those same people going to be able to translate into words how they do it? And are they going to want to do it? That’s not to cast them in a bad light. Understand that they may be under such intense personal pressure to continue to perform at such high levels that they just don’t have time to add “mentor” to their list of accomplishments.
Willing to Help
Good mentors are passionate about helping others. Often they are to be found simply by observing who has already shown an interest in you. Think about all the managers, business leaders, and high achievers at your company and identify those who have shown an interest in you and how you’re doing. These are people who when you pass them in the hall, always want to know how you’re doing. They are the people who send you a quick note of encouragement or a congratulatory message. Sometimes they are the folks who remember your birthday.
Conclusion
Having a mentor is important. Intentionally choosing a mentor who meets these three criteria assures you that you’re going to be building a relationship with someone who can help and guide you as you develop yourself as a manager. Having a mentor isn’t just for new managers either. The day you feel you are beyond needing a coach is the day you begin to decline in you performance as a manager.
Transformational Exercise
Who is your mentor or mentors? Commit to write down their name or names on paper. Consider sending them a note of thanks for helping you if you haven’t done that recently.
